Anger Management

May 13, 2005 | Category: Reflections & Musings

When I first started this blog, I kept telling myself, “Do I really want to blog about my sex life? It’s practically non-existant at this point of time. My past is just now memories that I happened to live through. What am I getting myself into?”

Before “Profound Sentiments of the Demented Soul“, I had another blogsite. You know, the kind of blogsites that no one ever visits? The only people I know actually reads that site was only a very few close friends and one or two of my cousins and maybe two other strangers whom I’ve gotten to know as friends now. Apart from that, that blog is practically dead. Strangely enough, I loved that blogsite to bits. Why? Because I put my life and time to it. I would spent hours and hours desgining it, touching it up with links and photos. I suppose it was to kill time, a hobby. I would blog a lot about my baking rendezvous. Yes, apart from sex, I love to bake. Everything and anything about my life was blogged in that blogsite. Hell, I even had photos of myself.

Yet, I still felt something was missing. My deep dark secret that I’ve kept for so many years. Secrets that only a handful of people knew. I knew my blog life would change if I started a new blog. And it has, and for so many reason beyond it. Eventually, I had to shut down my other blogsite, because my fear of being discovered, hence the anonymity now. Till today, I dare say still only a handful of friends and family know of this current blog. In the beginning, I was convinced that if I ever told any of my cousins about my sex eccentricities, I would be deemed as “the one with the loose screw”. After much contemplation, I told one of my cousins and the reason I did so was because she is about the same age as I am, two, we’re very very close, and three, I know of her special rendezvous as well. Her reaction didn’t come to a surprise to me, as she too shared the very same sentiments as I did. I LOVE YOU CUZ!! I know you’re reading this.

However, not many people I have found out shared that very same sentiments. I had received many mixed views of it. Some claimed my blog is well, “too detailed for their liking”, while others prefer labeling me as a “sex object”. It’s like I’m a sex kitten with one main agenda and that just “SEX”, nothing else but sex. Well, I have two words for you “FUCK YOU!” I’m just not any dumb bimbo who’s into sex round the clock. I just find it plain demeaning and lewd. If you really wanted to get into my pants, please do it with some decency. PUHLEASE! I’m not just some sex object you can just pick up and bang, this day and age. Just because I used to it, that doesn’t mean I still do it. So puhlease have a little more fucking respect.

Having said that, I want to thank some of you who had left some inspiring and touching message in my period of depression, although it was a pretty short. I’m not saying I’ve fully recovered, as I have contract viral fever because of that. I am still in recovery, hence the explosion of anger earlier; heh, yes it’s part of my recovery. Bloody hell, I also need a fucking vacation and retail therapy.

I shall soon return for more misadventures of my very arousing yet funny sexual adventures.

Stay tuned!

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